Category: Self-sacrifice
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When Your Spouse Stonewalls You And WW Linkup
Creating a confessional culture is not for the faint of heart, especially if you are trying to do so in a deeply wounded and dysfunctional marriage. As a marriage life-coach and counselor, I’d say that the majority of folks I deal with are in a relationship where one partner is doing most of the humbling…
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Covering for My Spouse and WW Linkup
I think there’s just something in the DNA of every human being that tries to cover up vulnerabilities and weaknesses that we see in ourselves. Believe me, I know what I’m talking about, because that describes me much more than I’d like to admit! However, I think this pattern started way back in the Garden…
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When and When NOT To Apologize – Plus WW Linkup!
Creating a confessional culture in your marriage should be developed with both discernment and timing in mind. Like most changes you want to make in life or marriage, you must go slowly and strategically, unless you are prepared for the entire effort to backfire on you! This is especially true if your spouse is not…
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The Unplugged Spouse {WW Linkup}
Today I’m so excited to have a guest post from Ugochi who blogs at Teshuva, where she writes on God’s redemption in life and marriage in ways that really resonate with what we are about here at Messy Marriage. She is continuing our discussion on striving for intimacy and oneness in marriage. I hope you’ll…
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Have a ‘Scary Good’ Marriage? And Linkup!
It’s seems crazy to think about it, but the characters, as well as, the audience that clamors for more of the movie 50 Shades of Grey are really seeking the “scary good” that can only be experienced through the deep intimacy of a committed and safe marriage. God’s intimacy with us is represented by the…
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Will you meet ‘my’ needs? SJT Video
In this video, I share how anytime I seek my independence and focus on getting “my needs”* met in marriage, I create something of a “tug-of-war” with my husband. I offer a “work-in-progress” strategy that has changed the dynamic and atmosphere of my marriage drastically for the better whenever I use it! I hope you’ll check it out…
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The Communication Tool that Opens Hearts … and Linkup!
If you’ve been viewing over the past month or so my video podcasts, then you’re aware that I promised to tell you about a communication “tool” that my husband and I use to handle conflicts effectively. That tool is “reflective listening.” I’m going to provide detailed instructions on how to practice reflective listening in its…
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Need More Compassion?
Luke 10:25-37 Thoughts – In this reading, an expert in the law was trying to trip Jesus up with the question of … What must we do to inherit eternal life?* Jesus asked him what the law says, and the man quoted, … We are to love the Lord our God with all our heart,…
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How I Help My Husband … In His View
Today we are joining “Marriage Monday” to discuss the topic of “helping our husbands” as referenced in Gen. 2:18. I chose to interview the one I help, my husband, Gary. Check out what he has to say on the subject … What do you think God means when he created me to be your…
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Is it Always Your Fault?
Do you feel like “the problem” spouse? I know about this troubling dynamic, because I was the one blaming my spouse for the fault in our marriage—both verbally and in my head. I couldn’t escape the belief that my husband, Gary, was the problem! And if I could just “fix” him or worse … get…
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