My Marriage Mess
Early in my marriage, my husband and I knew that with each passing day, we were making a bigger and bigger mess of our marriage. We were young, and perhaps naive enough to not know how to change it.
Since we were both Christians who were active in our church and growing in our faith, we were confused about why we were struggling so much. So we decided at some point to seek out a marriage counselor.
Through those counseling sessions, God began to pull back the layers of our marriage, revealing to us, not just the mess we had in our marriage, but also the mess we had in our heads and hearts. We somehow believed that it was our spouse’s fault for the mess we were in!
It wasn’t until we were able to admit our own contribution to the mess of our marriage and humbly surrender that mess to God, that He was finally able to do His redeeming and renewing work in our marriage.
We are still a work in progress. But I have to say, God has brought us so far from those dark and messy early days. Now our marriage perspective is not based upon what we can get from each other or who’s at fault for the latest mess.
We’ve learned how to forgive one another and accept one another as the broken, sinful partners we are. And we’ve learned to surrender our messes daily to the only One who can enable us to love each other as He loves us … with a Big, God-Sized Love!
I have a Masters’s Degree in Marriage and Family Counseling and have counseled women and married couples for over 14 years. I’m also actively involved in leading the women’s recovery groups in our church, where my husband is Pastor of Care and Recovery.
My husband, Gary and I have been married for 33 years and counting! We have three handsome sons, Jordan, Graham and Braden, as well as, our newest family member, Sarah, Jordan’s new wife and our “daughter-in-love!” I just love living this messy life with all of them and especially with the One who redeems all of our many messes—Christ!
This Blog and Ministry
I began to post here on October 10th, 2010. So messymarriage.com is now twelve years old! Back in February of 2000, I began to blog at another spot online. So, all told, I’ve been blogging for 13 years now! Whew! Who’d of thunk it?
Though this blogging journey has had many more ups than downs, it has also tested me to my limits. It’s very time-consuming and costly (financially). I’m not complaining! I just want you to know how much of a labor of love my ministry here is. That means I love you more than if everything came easy. The same holds true for my husband and marriage! ha!
Well, thanks so much for visiting, my friend! And I hope you keep coming back around!