Category: Avoidance
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How to Deal with Unwanted and Lingering ‘Grief’ this Christmas
Christmas time can be a time to make and remember sweet memories even as it also triggers grief because of those very memories or lost opportunities. Typically, this is because of the loss of loved ones either because they died near Christmas long ago or because it’s one of your first Christmases without them. Sometimes […]
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6 Reasons Why It Helps to Examine Your Heart
Are you that person who avoids letting a doctor examine you? Maybe it’s just that you don’t like getting on that dreaded scale! Perhaps you fear that your doctor will diagnose a problem that you’d rather remain in denial about. Maybe the pandemic has you feeling a bit skittish about entering a doctor’s office—a potential […]
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How My Father Issues Impacted My Marriage
I didn’t have much of a relationship with my father growing up. He was like a stranger to me in many ways because he was a workaholic pastor who wasn’t home much. When he was, he didn’t know how to reach out or connect with me. When I got married, I brought both a fear of connection […]
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How to Face Suffering Like Jesus and Why it Helps
This is a golden oldie I’ve pulled from my vault, written years ago. I hope it encourages you in every struggle and trial you face in life or marriage. Anyone who knows me well, knows I’m not much of a crier—at least not someone who usually cries publicly. But put me through a time of […]
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How to Stop Hiding and Improve Your Life and Marriage
When I was a little girl, my way of dealing with sadness or the sins I had committed was to crawl under my bed and hide. This provided a soothing escape among the dark shadows that seemed to mirror my state of mind. No one but the shoes next to my head knew the tears […]
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5 Ways to C.L.E.A.N. Up Manipulating Your Spouse with Guilt
Today, I’m excited to continue in the “Spring Clean Your Marriage” series with my next guest blogger, Karen Friday. I feel a special kinship with her because she’s a pastor’s wife like me! I hope you’ll check out her bio below and make her feel welcome by commenting and sharing her wise words all around […]
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3 Ways to Fix Broken Communication in Marriage
Today, I’m honored to offer one more post in my “Lessons Learned in Marriage Series”—this time on communication by guest blogger Crystal Twaddell. I hope you’ll read Crystal’s insights to find out how to navigate this challenge in marriage better. And be sure to check out her bio below, as well as supporting her with your […]
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4 Reasons to Make Love Even When Angry at Your Husband
It was the eve of our one-year wedding anniversary, and my husband and I had one of our biggest fights. We went to bed angry. Rather, he went to bed, and I went to the couch. I wept through most of the night, mourning the death of the marriage of my dreams. Sprawled on the […]
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Running from Healing? Devotional
Years ago, a devotional I had written, “Running from Healing?” was published on the now defunct “Life Letter Cafe” site. But I believe it is a subject that resonates with a lot of my readers. So I’m sharing it again here on Messy Marriage! I hope it gives you some food for thought. Ever feel […]
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Asking For Too Much Conversation in Marriage?
Let’s face it. There are major differences between men and women, but none more obvious than in the desire for conversation. There’s a drastic difference in the amount of communication women typically use on any given day versus men. Studies have actually been done on this that reveal how women use approximately 20,000 words per day, […]
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