Category: Unfair Realities in Marriage

• The Unfair Task of Making God Priority Over Your Mate

  

  Ever find yourself frustrated or even embarrassed by your mate’s devotion to God? Or maybe it’s your own spiritual fervor that your mate feels bothered and/or intimidated by. Maybe you both feel like your marriage is faltering, even though you’ve focused intense energy on each other and your family. So it just doesn’t add up…

  BethSteffaniak

  June 17, 2018

  Acceptance, Alienation, Avoidance, Christ-Centered, Commitment, Conflict, Differences, Discouragement, Expectations, Faith in God, Marriage, Perseverance, Perspective, Positive Focus, Prayer, Priorities, Realistic Expectations, Spiritual Growth, Spiritual Mismatch, Spiritual Practices, Spiritual Warfare, Spiritually Unequal, Unfair Realities in Marriage, Withdrawal

  Devotion, Devotion to God, Division, Jealousy, Priority, Resentment, Retaliation, Trust God

• The Unfair Task of Remembering Your Spouse is Not the Enemy

  

  Do you ever feel like your mate is your enemy—or is at least acting like one? Sadly, in the heat of conflicts in marriage, it’s easy to be confused about who the real Enemy is. In marriage, we’re often tempted to point fingers at each other, rather than keeping in mind that it might NOT…

  BethSteffaniak

  June 10, 2018

  Alienation, Blaming, Christ-Centered, Conflict, Discouragement, Encouragement, Faith in God, False Beliefs, Forgiveness, Humility, Marriage, Negative Self-Talk, Perspective, Pride, Realistic Expectations, Resentments, Salvation, Spiritual Warfare, Trials, Truth, Unfair Realities in Marriage, Vulnerability, Weakness

  Christian, Deception, enemy, Humility, Lies, Pride, Resentments, Salvation, Satan, Spiritual Warfare, Trials, Truth

• The Unfair Task to Avoid Lust and Attraction to Others

  

  When I first got married I was under the mistaken notion that I would never feel attracted to anyone other than my husband. I was, after all, deeply in love and thought that “love was all I needed” to fight back any desires, urges or attractions to others. This made me a prime target for…

  BethSteffaniak

  June 3, 2018

  About Me, Accountability, Affairs, Alienation, Attraction, Bad Habits, Betrayal, Bonding, Boundaries, Change, Choices, Christ-Centered, Commitment, Contentment, Desires, Discouragement, Emotions, Encouragement, Faith in God, Infatuation, Love for God, Lust, Marriage, Positive Focus, Prayer, Resentments, Self-Reflection, Self-sacrifice, Sex & Sexuality, Sex/Porn Addiction, Spiritual Practices, Unfair Realities in Marriage

  Accountability, Attraction, Boundaries, Desire, Faithful, Guard Heart, Guard Marriage, Love of God, Lust, Prayer, Unfair Realities

• The Unfair Task of Being Transparent in Marriage No Matter What

  

  Ever struggle to be open and transparent to your mate about a mistake you’ve made or a troubling thought or feeling you’ve had? So you hide it or stuff it, and try to go on with life as usual.  Where do we get the idea that this is ever a good thing? After all, the…

  BethSteffaniak

  May 27, 2018

  Boundaries, Christ-Centered, Communication, Confession, Conflict, Deception, Denial, False Beliefs, Fear, Nagging, Negative Self-Talk, Openness, Spiritual Growth, Trust, Truth, Unfair Realities in Marriage, Vulnerability

  Communication, Confession, Conflict, Honesty, Marriage, Open, Transparency, Transparent, Truth, Vulnerable

• The Unfair Task of Holding in Your Personal Truth in Marriage

  

  Did you know that my husband is an open book with a transparent cover and see-through pages?! I always know exactly where I stand with him at just about every moment in our marriage. This can be a good thing most of the time. I’m grateful for his openness and willingness to clear the air.…

  BethSteffaniak

  May 20, 2018

  Acceptance, Anger, Attitude, Authenticity, Blaming, Boundaries, Christ-Centered, Communication, Confession, Conflict, Confrontation, Connection, Criticism, Discouragement, Emotions, Empathy, Encouragement, Grace, Listening Skills, Marriage, Openness, Pain, Patience, Positive Focus, Prayer, Realistic Expectations, Relief, Respect, Safety, Self-Protection, Self-sacrifice, Spiritual Practices, Support, Truth, Unfair Realities in Marriage

  Boundaries, Communication, Discretion, Hold Tongue, Kindness, Listen, Openness, Respect, Sensitivity, Timing, Truth, Understanding

• The Unfair Task of Praying for Your Marriage Even If It Feels Passive

  

  We all have heard the phrase, “Well, if all else fails, at least we can pray about it!” It’s like you’ve tried everything else to get your marriage back on track and nothing has worked. So, I guess it’s time to get busy praying! 😉 Well, yes and no. It is time to pray. But it…

  BethSteffaniak

  May 13, 2018

  Acceptance, Accountability, Alienation, Anger, Apologies, Attitude, Choices, Christ-Centered, Conflict, Discouragement, Encouragement, Faith in God, Marriage, Marriage Mistakes, Positive Focus, Prayer, Priorities, Proactive, Spiritual Growth, Spiritual Practices, Surrender, Unfair Realities in Marriage

  Conflict, Encouragement, Faith in God, Healing, Marriage Prayer, Peace, Prayer, Unity

• The Unfair Task of Accepting Your Mate’s Aging Body

  

  I’m no fool. The reflection in my mirror clearly reveals to me just what age I am. And I’d be crazy to think I could keep my weight the same as the day I walked the aisle. Not only that, but I’d be in for the biggest inferiority complex ever, if I thought I my…

  BethSteffaniak

  May 6, 2018

  Acceptance, Alienation, Anger, Attitude, Attraction, Bonding, Change, Choices, Christ-Centered, Commitment, Connection, Contentment, Desires, Discouragement, Encouragement, Expectations, Faith in God, Love, Love for God, Love of God, Marriage, Negative Self-Talk, Perfectionism, Perspective, Positive Focus, Prayer, Realistic Expectations, Spiritual Practices, Unfair Realities in Marriage

  Acceptance, Aging, Aging Body, Aging Face, Attraction, Changing Body, Love, Love for God, Love of God, Marriage

• The Unfair Task to Love a Mate Who Won’t Love Back

  I grew up in a family that wasn’t very open with statements of love for each other. So I went into dating and marriage with a larger than average love-hunger. This drove me to expect a larger portion of love than any “love interest” could humanly feed me. As you can imagine, this put tremendous…

  BethSteffaniak

  April 29, 2018

  Acceptance, Alienation, Avoidance, Christ-Centered, Connection, Discouragement, Encouragement, Expectations, Faith in God, Insecurity, Love, Love of God, Marriage, Pain, Perseverance, Positive Focus, Redemption, Resentments, Self-sacrifice, Unfair Realities in Marriage

  Anger, Christ, Conflict, Faith in God, God’s Love, Love, Rejection, Suffering, Unfair Task

• The Unfair Task of Respecting Your Mate No Matter What

  

  I think people often confuse respect and trust. Why do I say that? Because I hear people, women in particular, saying their mates must earn their respect before they will show respect. I totally understand the challenge to treat with respect the mate who acts in a way that is not respectable. It certainly feels…

  BethSteffaniak

  April 22, 2018

  Acceptance, Anger, Attitude, Avoidance, Betrayal, Change, Choices, Christ-Centered, Conflict, Discouragement, Emotions, Entitlement, Expectations, False Beliefs, Grace, Jesus’ Sacrifice, Love, Love for God, Marriage, Negative Self-Talk, Patience, Perseverance, Positive Focus, Realistic Expectations, Respect, Responsibility, Self-deception, Submission, Surrender, Trust, Unfair Realities in Marriage, Vulnerability

  Disrespect, Emotions, Jesus’ Sacrifice, Respect, Respectable, Submission, Trust, Unfair Realities, Withdrawal

• Unfair Task of Forgiving an Unapologetic Spouse

  

  Back in the early days of my marriage, I would shut down emotionally whenever my husband did or said something to hurt my feelings. And I wouldn’t open up to him or forgive him until he apologized. This was one of the stupidest moves I made back in the day! It fueled even greater conflict…

  BethSteffaniak

  April 15, 2018

  Acceptance, Alienation, Anger, Apologies, Blaming, Christ-Centered, Confession, Conflict, Confrontation, Forgiveness, Grace, Humility, Jesus’ Sacrifice, Marriage, Negative Self-Talk, Positive Focus, Prayer, Resentments, Responsibility, Self-awareness, Self-Reflection, Self-sacrifice, Unfair Realities in Marriage, Vulnerability, Wounds

  Acceptance, Anger, Apologize, Bible, Encouragement, Forgive, Forgiveness, Scripture, Unapologetic, Unfair, Unfair Realities