Category: Comfort
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When Your Apology is Used Against You – And WW Linkup!
It’s never easy to make yourself vulnerable nor to lay your heart out on the table in a sincere and humble apology before the one person on earth who matters most—your spouse. But what’s worse is when your spouse uses your apology against you. Typically, a spouse won’t do this unless: Your spouse simply got…
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Will you soothe my mood? SJT Video
Ever give yourself permission to vent with your spouse? Well, I certainly do and have! In my latest “Sloppy Joe Time” video, I share what I’m trying to get my spouse to do when I vent (yes, that means “messy manipulation” is present!). And I share the three positive strategies I’m using to turn that…
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Why Can’t I Run to My Mom? SJT Video
In today’s “Sloppy Joe Time” video, I’m talking about an unhealthy practice I had early in my marriage. I was still running to my mother’s arms, when I should’ve been running to God’s and never leaving my husband’s! Can you relate? I hope you’ll click on the video below to see what I discovered and…
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Have a ‘Scary Good’ Marriage? And Linkup!
It’s seems crazy to think about it, but the characters, as well as, the audience that clamors for more of the movie 50 Shades of Grey are really seeking the “scary good” that can only be experienced through the deep intimacy of a committed and safe marriage. God’s intimacy with us is represented by the…
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Wondering if God is there for you? And Linkup!
Do you ever struggle to feel like God is active in healing your marriage and life? Do you wonder if He hears your prayers or is “for” you in the daily struggles you encounter? I had a day yesterday that, if I lived by the circumstances or my feelings, could have confirmed that God was…
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Desperate Marriage Myth #1
Recently I conducted a survey here at Messy Marriage and I can tell from the responses that many of you are in desperate situations and don’t know what to do about your marriage. It’s important to recognize four myths identified by Gary Chapman in his book, Desperate Marriages that often surface in our thinking when…
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Feel Alone in Marriage or Life?
I’ve been scouring over my journals from my very messy marriage years because I’m working on writing the book – Messy Marriage {Yay!}. And as I’ve done so, I’ve recalled how alone and alienated I often felt during those years {Not so Yay!}. In a messy marriage it’s easy to feel that you and…
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Are You Accidentally In-Validating Your Spouse?
A couple of weeks ago I wrote “4 Ways to Validate Your Spouse” and one of my readers (Laura Lee of Outnumberedmom) suggested that I write about what validation is NOT because many people think they’re validating someone when nothing is further from the truth. I totally agree! I’ve been there, in a deep conversation…
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Finding Calm Before & After the "Storm"
For the most part, I am an anxious person. And nothing makes me more stressed and anxious than a conflict. It’s nothing for me to face an important confrontation with my mouth dry as cotton and my voice quivering with fear as I stammer out my disjointed thoughts. The greater the intensity of the…
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Is My "Comfort Zone" Really Safe?
We are continuing on in our series about being “consumed” and today the focus is on being consumed with comfort … Photo by kennymatic As I write this post, I sit in my “Easy Chair” with legs perched atop my pillow-covered ottoman. The A/C is set to a comfortable 77 degrees, but if that’s not…
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