Category: Love of God
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Are You Invisible or Transparent in Life and Marriage?
Over the years, I’ve discovered just how important being transparent is to the health of my life and marriage. Sadly, in our day and time, transparency has been replaced with either pretentious posturing or defensive dodging. I’d like to refer to pretentious posturing AND defensive dodging as actually choosing to be “invisible.” People who react…
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Feeling the Forgiveness
I’ve talked a lot about forgiveness on this blog over the years, because I’ve learned first hand that it’s what brings calmness out of messy moments in my marriage. So it only makes sense that it should be the foundation of marriage, since forgiveness is the foundation of what Christ did for us in all…
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The Unfair Task of Accepting Your Mate’s Aging Body
I’m no fool. The reflection in my mirror clearly reveals to me just what age I am. And I’d be crazy to think I could keep my weight the same as the day I walked the aisle. Not only that, but I’d be in for the biggest inferiority complex ever, if I thought I my…
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The Unfair Task to Love a Mate Who Won’t Love Back
I grew up in a family that wasn’t very open with statements of love for each other. So I went into dating and marriage with a larger than average love-hunger. This drove me to expect a larger portion of love than any “love interest” could humanly feed me. As you can imagine, this put tremendous…
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6 Motivators for Improving Your Love Language Deficit
No one would argue that speaking our mate’s love languages can really improve the feeling of love in our marriages. But what do we do when our love languages conflict and change over time? And more importantly, what are the motivators for improving how often and how much we speak our mate’s love language in…
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8 Red Flags That Might Mean Your Spouse is Having an Affair
Here at Messy Marriage I always try to encourage spouses to persevere in their marriages with the help of the Lord, even though sometimes a major problem, like an affair, can rock a marriage to its core. If this is, or might be, your situation, my hope is that you aren’t immediately running for a…
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4 Reasons God Does NOT Want You to Marry Your Soulmate
I remember a time when I questioned almost daily whether I had married the right man or my “soulmate.” I had fallen for the perverted cultural mindset that marriage should be all about me, and making my life better … even easier. So whenever my marriage hurt more than it encouraged me, I swallowed the…
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Giving Grace When it’s Hard and Goes Unnoticed
One of the hardest challenges of living out grace in my marriage has and continues to be extending grace (my “one word”) when it has gone unnoticed or does not get returned. I think that’s because positives can easily go under the radar for most everyone—especially and including by me! 😉 The negatives, the bad…
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3 Ways to Cover Others with Love When Hurt or Stressed
How did you fare on getting through the stress of the Thanksgiving holiday? Did it fill you up with large helpings of turkey, as well as fun times spent with family and friends? Or were you fed up by someone’s hurtful words and/or actions? Sadly, family gatherings often come and go with heaping portions of…
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2 Important Ways to Love the ‘Turkey’ at Your Table
I don’t know about you, but I’ve both loved and hated the family gatherings that come with Thanksgiving or other holiday celebrations. Typically, this is because of the work that leaves me and so many others I love stressed. But sometimes the stress come from awkward and friction-filled, even resentment-laden, relationships that we have with…
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