Category: Codependency
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10 of My Favorite Posts
I’d like to share ten of my favorite posts (in no particular order) that I’ve done here at Messy Marriage. Most are recent, but there are a few that go a bit further back in the vault. I hope you find them to be encouraging, thought-provoking and marriage-challenging! Validating Your Spouse’s Feelings Find God’s Redemptive…
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Peacemaker or Peacekeeper? And WW Linkup
Since my post last week encouraged the extending of grace to our mates, I felt it was important to explain the difference between giving grace (peacemaking) and enabling unhealthy behavior (peacekeeping). After all … [Tweet ” Enabling and extending grace are two very different things that often get mistaken for each other.”] I’ve provided a…
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Did I make you mad? SJT Video
In this “Sloppy Joe Time” video, I’m tackling the need for perspective whenever my spouse is irritated, grouchy, feeling bad or whatever, but it has nothing to do with me. In those times, I tend to get too close to the situation and try to take responsibility for what is my husband’s responsibility and problem.…
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Why Your Spouse Can’t Meet Your Needs and WW Linkup!
It’s easy to fall into a codependent or entitled mindset in marriage when we focus on the legitimate “needs” our spouse should be meeting in our lives. You might be thinking, “Come again? Shouldn’t I focus on meeting the needs of my spouse? And I would say a resounding, “YES, you should!” I think being…
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Bringing Balance to Our Families {Linkup and Giveaway!}
I was raised in your standard, run-of-the-mill dysfunctional home. I didn’t know it at the time, but in my family of origin codependency abounded! Some people make the mistake of assuming that you can only be “codependent” if there’s an addict who is “dependent” upon drugs or alcohol in your family. But codependency happens whenever there is…
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Who Should Apologize First?
I hope you’ll take two and a half minutes to watch this first of many videocast installments here at MM on “Sloppy Expectations in Marriage.” Part of the reason I’ve decided to add videos is: I’m still having arm/hand/tendonitis issues and typing adds to that problem. Creating a video is less “typing-intensive.” I’ve always wanted…
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Never Asked My Spouse to Help and Wedded Wed Link Up!
While I’m taking a four week break from blogging, I’m sharing some older posts from way back in MM’s vault. This was my very first post that kicked-off a series I dubbed the “Top 10 Mistakes I Made in Marriage.” It was published way back on October, 10 of 2010! Whoa, can’t believe it’s been…
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Too Close to Your Spouse? & Link up!
While I’m taking a break from blogging, I’m sharing some older posts from way back in MM’s vault. This article was originally published almost two years ago to this day – July 18th, 2012! What? Did I read that right? Can I really be too close to my spouse? Maybe that’s what you were thinking…
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Does forgiving let my offender off the hook?
Today we’re continuing in our forgiveness series, debunking the myth – “If I forgive, I’m letting my offender off the hook of responsibility.” Like most myths this one has both falsehood and truth. Let’s start with the truth … In Jesus’ parable of the “Unmerciful Servant” in Matthew 18:21-35, Christ’s example of forgiveness is illustrated…
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Repeating the Past?
Like it or not, humans are creatures of habit … by harminder dhesi photography Especially when we feel our habit is not “complete.” We like to resolve things, fix things, have a “happy ending,” if you will—clinging to them, like a dog to an old bone! That’s why we end up being drawn into marriages…
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