Category: Conflict
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How Suffering Can Improve Your Marriage and Life
Back when I entered marriage many years ago, I was young, naïve and totally idealistic. I thought that marriage would fulfill the longings in my heart that had been bubbling up all throughout my childhood and teen years. Naturally, I was far too familiar with the fairytale endings that Disney churned out, and was equally…
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6 Motivators for Improving Your Love Language Deficit
No one would argue that speaking our mate’s love languages can really improve the feeling of love in our marriages. But what do we do when our love languages conflict and change over time? And more importantly, what are the motivators for improving how often and how much we speak our mate’s love language in…
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64 Abusive Actions That Spell Trouble for Your Marriage
We live in a culture and world racked by a rising and alarming number of sexual abuse accusations right now. But in marriage, the issue of abuse of every type can be extremely murky and convoluted. I think that’s because it’s so hard to know when your spouse is crossing a healthy and appropriate boundary…
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8 Red Flags That Might Mean Your Spouse is Having an Affair
Here at Messy Marriage I always try to encourage spouses to persevere in their marriages with the help of the Lord, even though sometimes a major problem, like an affair, can rock a marriage to its core. If this is, or might be, your situation, my hope is that you aren’t immediately running for a…
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3 Ways to Cover Others with Love When Hurt or Stressed
How did you fare on getting through the stress of the Thanksgiving holiday? Did it fill you up with large helpings of turkey, as well as fun times spent with family and friends? Or were you fed up by someone’s hurtful words and/or actions? Sadly, family gatherings often come and go with heaping portions of…
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2 Important Ways to Love the ‘Turkey’ at Your Table
I don’t know about you, but I’ve both loved and hated the family gatherings that come with Thanksgiving or other holiday celebrations. Typically, this is because of the work that leaves me and so many others I love stressed. But sometimes the stress come from awkward and friction-filled, even resentment-laden, relationships that we have with…
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What I Learned About Myself by Doing an ‘Argument Autopsy’
Recently, I was Sheila Gregoire’s guest at her blog, To Love Honor and Vacuum, where I shared about an argument I had with my husband years ago that resulted in several important and helpful insights about myself. Though I don’t exactly enjoy having to learn lessons the hard way, that’s often the best and most…
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Three Ways to Fight Spiritual Attacks on Your Marriage (Plus Linkup)
I’d like you to welcome blogger, Leslie Newman, who is my guest today while I’m away, and is sharing her wise perspective on how to fight for our marriages when we come under a spiritual attack by Satan. I hope you’ll make her feel right at home by commenting, as well as sharing her guest…
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4 Ways Satan Divides Us in Marriage (Linkup and Giveaway!)
Today, I’m continuing to unpack my series on spiritual warfare in marriage—focusing today on how Satan loves to divide us as couples when we pursue good and godly things. Whenever the Enemy can’t divide us from God, he goes the roundabout way by dividing us as couples, which often divides us from the Lord when all is…
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4 Ways Listening Draws My Mate to Me
My husband and I did not enter marriage as great listeners or with amazingly refined listening skills. We were young and really not all that aware of how important listening was to our marriage. I would go on in those early days of marriage to get my Masters Degree in Marriage and Family Counseling, where…
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