Category: Choices
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Victim Love Style in Marriage And FMTM Linkup
Here at Messy Marriage, I’ve talked about a “Victim Mentality” a lot over the years, but this isn’t necessarily what I’m talking about today. A victim mentality can develop in any person’s life regardless of their love style. A victim mentality is a fixation on a real or supposed victimizer in one’s life, feeling helpless…
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The Controller Love Style And FMTM Linkup
With Thanksgiving in the U.S. a day away, it seems appropriate to discuss the many shades of a Controller “love style!” We wouldn’t be able to get through a true Thanksgiving meal or celebration without the “Control Freak” in somebody rising to the surface like a tasty batch of homemade rolls . . . minus…
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Getting Your Spouse to Open Up! Video
Getting a reluctant mate to open up to you is about as easy as coaxing a cranky toddler to eat his peas. At least, that’s what I’ve discovered in my own life. And it’s also what I’ve heard from countless others, especially wives, in conversationless marriages. Today I’m answering another reader’s question in my “Questioning…
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Vacillator ‘Love Style’ in Marriage Plus FMTM Linkup
Should I post on the Vacillator today, or not? Um, sure . . . I think I will! No, wait a minute . . . definitely not! Well . . . maybe I should! Just a little sarcasm to get this “love style” train chugging down or perhaps backing up along the proverbial track! My…
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3 Ways I’m Dealing with an Empty-Nest
I’m walking over an incredibly monumental transition or “threshold” in my life—that of being a full-fledged Empty Nester. Since that’s the case, I’ve felt like it might be good to do a series on the many “thresholds” we all go through in marriage and life. I will be alternating these posts with my videos that…
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Discussing Sticky Issues with Your Mate Without Getting Stuck
If you’re like me, you’ve often let your mouth fly wide open to reveal the manipulative and prideful intentions behind an effort “to discuss” a sticky issue. Ugh! You’re thinking that your words will bring clarity and understanding for your mate (cue the sound of angels singing from heaven). But all you really offered your…
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What I Learned from a Fight with My Husband
Toward the end of my month-long reorganizing, repairing, and purging that I was doing in my house in June, my husband and I had a fight. Mind you, it wasn’t related to the hard work that we were doing on the house. But it was a doozy of a misunderstanding on both our parts. I…
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Purging Pride And Linkup is Back!
As many of you know, my hubby Gary and I have wanted to get our house ready to put on the market for quite some time (we’re empty-nesters who desperately need to downsize). So I pulled away from “everything”—including blogging—for the month of June to get our house in shape for that big day that…
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When You Don’t Understand Your Marriage
Today, after a short vacation, I’m returning to my series on “persevering in the Lord.” This week I’m offering one more important way to persevere . . . We persevere in marriage by integrating God’s perspective into our lives. That’s because very often we don’t understand why we must face the pain and difficulty in…
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Being a Bossy-Pants Wife And WW Linkup
I find it amazing how every good gift that God gives can be taken and ruined—when given time and wrong motives—by us as humans. After all, a careful and wise use of control is what every good leader needs to wield! [Tweet “The trouble comes when you have two leaders fighting for control! #toomanychiefs”] Now…
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