Category: Toxic Baggage
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Dealing with Childhood Hurts
January’s “Share Your Story” is by, Shannon Little Shannon has been married for almost 15 years. She and Brian actually were divorced from each other for a few years and remarried 9 years ago.They have two sons, Cameron (13) and Caden (8).She lives by the mantra … balance mind, body, spirit. The depth of my “messy…
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In-Laws with "Depression" Stereotypes
Written by Scott and Heather CoppleMessy Marriage Team Members In-laws can cause all sorts of trouble in a marriage, especially when the married couple allows the intrusion of family. Our family of origin wreaks havoc on our marriage because of the baggage we bring along with us. Now, let the in-laws, themselves, enter the relationship…
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Are You Too Close to Your Spouse?
What? Did I read that right? Can I really be too close to my spouse? Maybe that’s what you were thinking when you read my title. You might’ve also wondered … What kind of marriage blog is this, anyway? The author doesn’t even want us to get close to our spouses! I’m outta here! But…
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Forgiving My Earthly Father
Last week I wrote about how my earthly “father issues” have negatively impacted my relationship with my husband, but with the emphasis being on my relationship with God. And I want to follow that up next time with how my father issues have impacted “my marriage.” But this time around, I want to take the…
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Abandonment
Written by Heather Copple Messy Marriage Team Member All of us come with baggage—it’s just a fact. Well, one of my big steamer trunks of “baggage” contains my abandonment issues. I have such big issues with it that I also have another steamer trunk that holds my attachment problems. Abandonment and attachment problems do not…
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What Are You Trying to Redo?
Ever wonder why you do the things you do? As human beings, everything we do is for a reason. Since God created us with such complexity, there may be a variety of reasons at play. But one of the important sources for all that we do is called the “Homing Instinct.” In today’s electronic world,…
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Rules of Engagement
Written by Heather Copple Messy Marriage Team Member Fighting and disagreeing with our spouse is bound to happen. We’re individuals who want and need different things at different times. We then share a space where privacy is not always present. We’re forced to deal with one another because we share a bedroom, house, children, and…
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Are You Fighting with a Ghost?
Recently, I’ve done some soul searching. Very often when my husband, Gary, and I disagree, it reminds me of the conflicts that my parents too often had when I was a child. And my first reaction to him in those times is to “table the conversation.” But recently I’m beginning to recognize that I’ve been…
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My Messy Upbringing
I come from a good, Christian family. My dad was a pastor and my mom was a devoted wife, mom and home-maker. I think if I had to sum up our family in one word it would be commitment. But sometimes my family was committed to the wrong ways of dealing with life—even though it…
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Unfinished Business
When my husband and I packed up our bags for our honeymoon, we didn’t know we were bringing along a few invisible, but very toxic bags from our past. And I had the dubious distinction of having not only “mother issues,” but also “father issues” when we got married. So my husband was saddled with…
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