Category: Avoidance
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The Problem of Avoiding Conflict with My Spouse and WW Link Up!
Today is another repost of an oldie {October 2010} but a goodie from my series, “The Top Ten Mistakes I Made in Marriage.” Enjoy! I grew up in a family that didn’t really know how to resolve conflicts in a healthy way. Often my parents played opposite positions in times of conflict. But neither position…
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Desperate Marriage Myth #4 – Hopeless Situation
Today we’re looking at the last of the myths, Myth #4 – Some situations are hopeless and my situation is one of these. When people are in a desperate situation where positive change seems impossible or at least a distant memory, they tend to take on a victim mentality. With a victim mentality, you begin…
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Feel Alone in Marriage or Life?
I’ve been scouring over my journals from my very messy marriage years because I’m working on writing the book – Messy Marriage {Yay!}. And as I’ve done so, I’ve recalled how alone and alienated I often felt during those years {Not so Yay!}. In a messy marriage it’s easy to feel that you and…
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Intimate Insecurities
Written by Kimberly GreenMessy Marriage Team Writer When I was a little girl, we had a brown crocheted blanket that lived in the family room, ever available to warm you on a chilly night. For me, this blanket had many uses. It was a glamorous gown for playing dress up; a fortress; an island where…
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5 Texts You Should Never Send Your Spouse
This past weekend, my husband and I had the privilege of attending our church’s annual marriage retreat. Our guest speaker was Doug Fields,* an amazing communicator and family man. He reminded us that technology has connected us with our world, while very often disconnecting us from our spouses. So in that spirit, here’s my advice…
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Denial and the Monster Within
Denial very often operates like the typical plotline of a bad horror movie. We watch as the protagonist (often a young, beautiful woman) is sitting in a peaceful corner of her empty and secluded, century-old farmhouse. Suddenly she’s startled by a noise coming from the eerie dark bedroom down the hall. Sensing danger, she gathers…
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Are You a Texticator?
credit For those of you who are a product of “old school Christianity” your mind probably went immediately from my invented word “texticator” to “fornicator”—a word we don’t use so much in our everyday vernacular. If so, then I’m glad, because that’s almost how revolting I want this practice to sound to you from now…
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Blaming Yourself for the Mess?
Sometimes we get hung up in a messy marriage because we blame our partner or even God, like I mentioned in my post last week, Feeling Trapped in a Loveless Marriage. But sometimes we feel we’re the one to blame for the messes in our marriage. Are you burdened down with guilt and shame for…
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I’m Having an Affair … With My Cell Phone!
Written by Gary Steffaniak Messy Marriage Team Member … at least, that’s what my wife says. Let me explain. Friday is my day off and usually my wife, Beth, and I spend the day together. When school is going on, our kids are not home, and typically the day is ours—an empty house with no…
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