Category: Anger
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When Can You Handle My Hurt? Video
Well, I’m back and excited to share my 5th “computer-side chat” with all of you {with a special shout out going to my sweet friend, Linda over at Creekside Ministries}! Each video in this series tackles the “sloppy expectations” we have in marriage, with this week being about the timing and sensitivity needed when sharing…
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Fought Fire with Fire! And WW Link Up!
Repost from October of 2010, from my series on the Top Ten Mistakes I Made in Marriage. This was number 4. For years, my husband and I went ‘round and ‘round when it came to conflict. He would do something that would rattle my chain, and then all of a sudden he’d notice I had…
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The Problem of Avoiding Conflict with My Spouse and WW Link Up!
Today is another repost of an oldie {October 2010} but a goodie from my series, “The Top Ten Mistakes I Made in Marriage.” Enjoy! I grew up in a family that didn’t really know how to resolve conflicts in a healthy way. Often my parents played opposite positions in times of conflict. But neither position…
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Assuming Too Much & WW Link Up!
Part of what I do as a counselor and life coach is to “speculate.” It’s easy to let this “skill” that’s often appropriate in one setting, carry over to my personal relationships where it is far from appropriate! In fact, whenever I’m around my hubby and speculate about what someone might think or feel, he very matter-of-factly…
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How to Let Bitterness Go
Today I want to look at the difficulty of releasing any hurt or bitterness we feel due to the sins “someone we are trying to reconcile with” may continue to commit against us. I want to stress, this is for the person who has chosen to forgive an offending spouse, has emotionally and spiritually worked…
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One Attitude Keeping Us from Reoffending
Today in our forgiveness series I’m discussing, “How an offender can maintain perspective and humility, so that reoffending is avoided and diminished, and change is achieved.” I sometimes I don’t realize how my offending behavior hurts my spouse and seeing this is crucial to honoring his boundaries and avoiding reoffending him. Here are some reasons…
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6 Steps to Effective Boundary Conversations

Today I will be continuing in our series on forgiveness, addressing what is needed to communicate clear and effective boundaries when rebuilding a wounded relationship. Step 1: Are you both ready? Determine if you both are ready for the boundary conversation. Look for clear evidence of a heart change in the other (not perfection, mind…
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Myth 1 & 2 – Forgive and Feel Better?
Today we’re addressing two myths – If I forgive, I will immediately and automatically feel better. If I forgive, I won’t feel hurt or angry again, no matter how many times my offender reoffends. One of the biggest motivators for me to forgive is the promise of feeling better. So let me clear – I’m…
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When You Don’t Feel Like Forgiving
If you’ve lived with the day in and day out abuse or hurt from a boundary-busting offender for very long, it’s easy to feel so fed up that you don’t want to forgive him or her. You may have come to believe the half-truth that forgiving someone means “you’ve let them off the hook.” Or…
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Feeling Broken by Your Offender?
When our hearts are broken by the sins of our offender—especially over and over—we typically want to do two things … 1. Hurt our offender the way they’ve hurt us. We might say this is simply to teach them a lesson—so they won’t hurt us or others again. Maybe there’s a grain of truth in…


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