Today we’re addressing two myths –
- If I forgive, I will immediately and automatically feel better.
- If I forgive, I won’t feel hurt or angry again, no matter how many times my offender reoffends.
One of the biggest motivators for me to forgive is the promise of feeling better.
So let me clear – I’m not saying that forgiving an offender won’t bring a peace from God and positive emotions in our hearts. It can and often does!
It’s just that sometimes we look at forgiveness as a sprint and expect to “win a prize” at the end of the race.
Do you remember the way the fictional character, Forest Gump “just ran” from Greenbow, Alabama to the west coast, and then he doubled back, running to the east coast and on and on? Ultimately, he was supposed to have run for 3 years, 2 months, 14 days and 16 hours!
Forgiveness is like that … only longer!
It’s a never-ending journey in this life that is filled with hills and valleys—both of which God wants to use to deepen our faith in Him!
When we choose to forgive, God’s grace pours into us—giving us a new perspective in that moment. And often there truly is a “moment” of feeling peace here.
- But sometimes “that moment” is shocked back to reality when we’re reinjured by our offender.
- And sometimes it’s because we’re faced with the lingering consequences that don’t go away simply because we forgave.
- Worse yet, there are times when a wound is so deep and an offense so heinous that making the choice to forgive doesn’t immediately bring that flood of peace and good emotion at all.
That’s when we’re “forgiving in faith” and “not living in feeling!”
Much of the forgiving I’ve done in life has been rooted and maintained in “forgiving by faith” {faith in God, not my offender} because …
My offender often reoffends and reinjures, but my God is faithful!
When we reach for God to heal that wound that’s been battered and sometimes broken open, He is faithful to comfort and bind up that wound. But He doesn’t always heal the wound completely. And He also doesn’t necessarily remove that offender, the consequences, or the continual offenses.
Instead, He leverages those yearnings, those pangs of pain and the unhealed wounds that remain, as a way to drive us deeper into His love.
We cannot truly know Christ’s sacrificial love and forgiveness without experiencing and trusting Him in these dark, painful valleys that He, Himself, walked.
So if you second guess yourself or wonder if you really didn’t forgive your offender because you still “feel” angry or still hurt when reoffended, then double back and head for the next coastline of God’s grace. I promise, He’s waiting for you with an ocean of His deep love and peace for you to swim in!
What feelings or fears do you still struggle with regarding a certain offender in your life?
What has God taught you on the long and winding journey of forgiveness that keeps you “running” toward Him today?
Photo by – “Mile Marker 13″ by Al King, edited by Beth Steffaniak
This is #9 in Forgiveness Series. Click link to access #8 – 7 Biggest Myths of Forgiveness
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Joining with Works for Me Wednesday, To Love Honor and Vacuum, Whimsical Wednesday and Wholehearted Wednesday
Now it’s time for Wedded Wednesday!
WW rules:
Write in any way you feel inspired about marriage, parenthood or anything that is spiritually encouraging.
- Enter in a permalink directly to your “blog post” and not the main URL to your blog.
- Be sure to include a link to “Wedded Wednesday” or add the WW button (code is in MM’s footer) to your current blog post and/or sidebar.
- Visit and comment on at least one other person’s blog that’s linked up here.
- Please no offensive or inappropriate content or sexually explicit images!
Optional but encouraged:
- Consider setting up your Gravatar profile and Disqus Profile with a link to your blog … it makes it so much easier for all of us to find those of you who blog!
- If you have the time, visit those who visit your blog and comment at their place as well … sort of a “Say it forward.”
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