Category: Perseverance
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The Unfair Task of Making God Priority Over Your Mate
Ever find yourself frustrated or even embarrassed by your mate’s devotion to God? Or maybe it’s your own spiritual fervor that your mate feels bothered and/or intimidated by. Maybe you both feel like your marriage is faltering, even though you’ve focused intense energy on each other and your family. So it just doesn’t add up…
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The Unfair Task to Love a Mate Who Won’t Love Back
I grew up in a family that wasn’t very open with statements of love for each other. So I went into dating and marriage with a larger than average love-hunger. This drove me to expect a larger portion of love than any “love interest” could humanly feed me. As you can imagine, this put tremendous…
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The Unfair Task of Respecting Your Mate No Matter What
I think people often confuse respect and trust. Why do I say that? Because I hear people, women in particular, saying their mates must earn their respect before they will show respect. I totally understand the challenge to treat with respect the mate who acts in a way that is not respectable. It certainly feels…
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Maintaining Sexual Intimacy When Sex isn’t Possible
I’m excited to have as my guest today Chris, from “The Forgiven Wife,” to help kick off a new series called “Rekindling and Reclaiming Sex in Marriage.” I hope you’ll make her feel right at home here, sharing with her in the comments, as well as to all your favorite social-media places! God’s intricate and beautiful…
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How Suffering Can Improve Your Marriage and Life
Back when I entered marriage many years ago, I was young, naïve and totally idealistic. I thought that marriage would fulfill the longings in my heart that had been bubbling up all throughout my childhood and teen years. Naturally, I was far too familiar with the fairytale endings that Disney churned out, and was equally…
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8 Red Flags That Might Mean Your Spouse is Having an Affair
Here at Messy Marriage I always try to encourage spouses to persevere in their marriages with the help of the Lord, even though sometimes a major problem, like an affair, can rock a marriage to its core. If this is, or might be, your situation, my hope is that you aren’t immediately running for a…
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Giving Grace When it’s Hard and Goes Unnoticed
One of the hardest challenges of living out grace in my marriage has and continues to be extending grace (my “one word”) when it has gone unnoticed or does not get returned. I think that’s because positives can easily go under the radar for most everyone—especially and including by me! 😉 The negatives, the bad…
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Why You Should Avoid Being the ‘Best Version of Yourself’
Have you heard the catchy slogan—be the “best version of yourself”? Author and motivational speaker Mathew Kelly was the one who came up with this motto and message. His upbeat focus has even penetrated the Christian mainstream—being encouraged in church services and between believers in the day-to-day. I also heard this mantra mentioned in the…
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How to Transform Discouraged Feelings into Firm Faith
There was a time when you might have accused me of being easily discouraged, rather than firm in my faith. And you would have been right in your estimation of me. Of course, I would have denied that you were really seeing into my heart or soul. I might have even defended my faithfulness by…
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How to Change Your Behavior so Your Marriage Can Improve (And Linkup)
Even though as a counselor I had to slog my way through lots of classes on Behavioral Psychology or Behavior Modification back in my old school days, I never really felt like behavior alone could create lasting or powerful change in marriage or relationships. However, that’s viewing things from the inside out, like Matthew 15:18…
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