I started blogging (another blog) back in Feb. 2009, and have been blogging at Messy Marriage since October 2010, so it feels like quite a long journey in many ways.

For the record . . . I’ve wanted to give up on this blogging endeavor many times! I’ve felt like it’s not worth it more times than I would like to admit. I’ve struggled to see some of my blogging friends move from blogging to authoring as their main focus, while I remain chugging along in what often feels like the same spot (though I know that’s not true). #missthosefriends 😉

But I know this is a season in my ministry and writing career—a season that has it’s highs and lows and will change before I know it!

The reason I bring all this up is because I see this being the same way in marriage and life.

At one time, I wondered if my marriage would ever get any better back in the season when my marriage was very messy.

And I could’ve let the pain overwhelm me. I could’ve decided that I was tired of the hard work and looked for what would make me happy instead—ultimately giving up on my marriage. 😦

I’ve seen, over the many years of my marriage, several of my friends throwing in the towel on their marriages. I’m not judging what their motives were/are for divorcing, but . . .

I do wonder, how would it have changed if they had persevered through that dry and difficult season?

Would they have been wise and humble enough to seek the help necessary to bring change?

Would they have learned how to avoid a victim mentality by doing what they could to feel stronger, better, more whole?

Would they have recognized that God is the Lover of their souls and quit pining after some elusive soul mate that they’ve become convinced is NOT their mate because he/she is difficult to live with?

Now before I go on, please know that I’m not talking about abusive marriages or situations here! Nor am I saying this is true of every couple that decides to divorce.

[Tweet “I’m talking about non-abusive marriages where both spouses feel hopeless to feel better. #holdon”]

Some have tried to change this, even for years, but perhaps it’s been more about trying to change their spouses than themselves. Perhaps it’s been more about persevering in ruminating daily on how hurtful their spouses act rather than “taking that captive” (2 Cor. 10:5) and replacing the bitterness with God’s truth daily, monthly, year after year.

So they buy the lie that changing their circumstances will change the way they feel in life.

If that’s true then I believe . . .

[Tweet “Many people are divorcing for all the wrong reasons.”]

And if they would decide instead to “persevere in the Lord” they would see their lives eventually moving into a season of hope and even joy.

Notice I didn’t say “see their marriages” moving there!

Sometimes it’s about finding your hope and joy in the Lord with or without your mate doing the same. You can’t force anyone to “persevere in the Lord” along with you. But I guarantee if you persevere in drawing near to the Lord, YOU will feel blessed. #Iamheretotestify

I want to unpack some practical/spiritual ways to “persevere in the Lord” in your life and marriage in the weeks to come. Also, I’m beginning a new series on Wedded Wednesday’s called, “My Failures, God’s Inroads.”  I hope you’ll join me for both!

What are some realities you’ve discovered after persevering through a tough season?

What are some signs that might indicate a person’s reason’s for divorcing are not wise?

Linking up with these fine blogs – Moments of Hope,  Weekend Whispers, Making Your Home Sing,  Mondays @ Soul Survival, Faith ‘n Friends, Word of God Speak, Spiritual Sundays, Sitting Among Friends, Give Me Grace, Family, Friendship and Faith, and DanceWithJesusFriday