Love Language Gift Ideas for Your Spouse

Love Language Gift - Find ideas for a Valentine's Gift for your spouse based on their love language at MM! #love #gift #giftideas #romance #sweetheart #Valentines

Because Valentine’s Day is just a few days away, I wanted to turn my focus to romance and the power of giving just the right gift to each of our unique partners.

I’d like to use Gary Chapman’s book, The Five Love Languages, as the basis for a Valentine’s Day gift-giving guide today.

Start by completing the free online profile/inventory at Chapman’s site to discover what your and your spouse’s love languages are.

If your spouse isn’t willing to do this, consider completing the inventory for him/her based on how you think he or she would answer. You’ll probably have a fairly accurate result that can give you ideas for what to give him/her for Valentine’s Day.

Love Languages and Gift Ideas that Correspond

1. Words of Affirmation

Write a love letter that shares all the things you love about your sweetheart, like how he/she:

  • Performs their job(s)
  • Parents your children
  • Shows you affection
  • Looks or dresses
  • Encourages you
  • Expresses their passion(s)
  • Lives out their faith
  • Demonstrates their talent(s)
  • Impacts other people’s lives for the good

You can also download my free Love Letter Questions that provides 24 prompts for helping you to affirm your spouse in written form. Then use the Love Letter Template to write your letter on! That’s really one of the most romantic things you could do and might ignite more passion than ever in your partner.

Fill a jar with compliments and affirmations about your spouse, then every day (perhaps at bedtime or mealtimes) encourage your spouse to open one more up and read it—with or without you present. Click to download and use my Daily Affirmations Guide as a jumping-off point or simply begin to use this at mealtime/bedtime from now on.

Schedule a romantic dinner for the two of you and either read the letter above or simply share all the ways you’ve seen your spouse excel and grow in this past year.

2. Acts of Service

Think of at least 10 ways that you could do an “act of service” for your spouse. Do something that he/she would love or that relieves him/her of that task. Write these on index cards or come up with some beautifully designed coupons to give your mate. But be sure to put them in a gift-wrapped box or lovely gift bag!

Another idea might be to fix your spouse’s favorite meal and dessert for an intimate dinner-for-two on Valentine’s Day. Here’s a recipe of my husband’s favorite Valentine’s dessert, Chocolate Covered Strawberries. Homemade ones are better than store-bought in my book! Then be sure to feed (acts of service) each other these romantic confections! Super sexy!

3. Quality Time

Similar to the “Acts of Service” cards above, write out as many creative date ideas as you can, then give it to your mate in a gift-wrapped box or bag.

Here are some (COVID-friendly) ideas:

  • Dance the night away in a roomy spot in your home or, if warm enough, outside.
  • Drive to several meaningful spots around town from your past—sharing how special those memories are while in your car.
  • Double-date with good friends that you trust are likely COVID-free!
  • Binge a show that you BOTH love together on your favorite streaming service. My all-time favorite Rom-com is Sleepless in Seattle. You can watch it for only $3.99 on Amazon Prime!
  • If the weather cooperates, build a snowman or go sledding together like you did when you were kids!
  • Live in a warmer climate? Go for a walk in the woods, on the beach, or at your favorite park while holding hands and chatting about the scenary.
  • Go out for a romantic dinner but ask each other some of the 365 questions that the Generous Wife came up with. Then really listen and reflect back on what you hear your spouse is saying. Get in his/her head and heart!

4. Receiving Gifts

Take your mate out for a shopping spree.

You’ll probably need to set a spending limit here but really have fun finding that perfect gift together.

Ask your spouse for gift ideas. 

Sometimes we don’t know what gift our sweethearts would really adore, so why not ask him/her to give you suggestions? Just be sure to get one of the things he/she suggested—no substitutes or inferior products allowed! 😉

Combine the gift of “Quality Time” with “Receiving Gifts” by planning and paying for a special trip the two of you can take together. If you’re too gun-shy to try this during the height of a pandemic, schedule it for this summer. Then give it to your spouse at your Valentine’s Day dinner.

5. Physical Touch

Pay for a couple’s massage or plan to give your mate one yourself. 

If you give your sweetie one, go all out with massage oils, scented candles, dim lighting, and relaxing music. Check out Cassie’s post over at TrueAgape for extra pointers.

Play some lover’s games based on the Song of Solomon.

Back in 2018, I shared three romantic/affectionate/erotic games that are inspired by passages in Song of Solomon. You can find that post here. It will give you all sorts of ideas and ways to physically touch and be affectionate with your spouse. I hope you try them out!

Happy Valentine’s Day, friends! Make it a sweet, cozy, and loving one with your spouse!



What other romantic gift ideas can you add to my suggestions above?


What is your love language and how/what would you like your mate to give to you this Valentine’s Day?



30 responses to “Love Language Gift Ideas for Your Spouse”

  1. I love these ideas! Out of curiosity I took the test again to see where I fell with the five love languages. I am a words of affirmation girl which I knew and acts of service is second.

    The jar of compliments is right down my alley as well as having someone make me dinner. Thank you for providing resources and wonderful ideas. Hope you and Gary have a wonderful Valentine’s day together.


    1. Thanks, Mary! I took it again too (since it’s been a while) and would’ve included my results but this post was turning into a beast! ha!

      And I’m the same way–words of affirmation with acts of service second. Though quality time is pretty important too. I did a jar with compliments for Gary many moons ago, so I’d say it’s time for another one. I think he really values affirmation–almost as much as affection. Gotta up my game in both areas! Thanks for sharing too, my friend!


  2. Andrew Budek-Schmeisser Avatar
    Andrew Budek-Schmeisser

    Great ideas, Beth!

    I too the test and found that I’m tied on Words Of Affirmation and Acts Of Service, with the other three pretty well zeroed out.

    The test isn’t really complete for someone like me, though, because I would far rather perform acts of service (or deliver praise) than receive them. I wonder if this is common?

    One thing I’d add for physical touch is tandem bungee jumping. Nothing like diving into an abyss, held only by a big rubber band and the arms of the one you love. 🙂


    1. That doesn’t surprise me about you, Andrew. I see how you live out those two love languages in your own life. And I agree about how our love languages are really areas where we excel personally. I think that’s why we value being given those same expressions of love back. I don’t know why that’s not explained more in the results, but it might be in the love languages book. I’ve read parts of the book but not all of it and it’s been many years ago that I did any reading of it. I just really feel like the approach since it is practical and meaningful.

      Tandem bungee jumping, eh? I’m not sure how well I would handle a bungee jumping date! I’m a wee bit afraid of heights. However, I can see how exhilarating that would be for a couple–bonding them in an amazing memory. Thanks for adding it!


  3. What a beautiful and great post. You have so many wonderful ideas on it.

    Thanks for hosting and have a wonderful rest of the week.


    1. Thanks, Patrick! I hope that you and your partner enjoy doing at least one of them! Great to have you in the linkup, as always!


  4. Great post! I’m a huge fan of the 5 Love Languages so I was super excited to see your gift guide be around that! Thank you for the mention about massages as a physical touch idea!


    1. I hope that you and Ryan find one of my ideas sparks a date idea for you two lovebirds. I know that you’re super busy now with your sweet new baby. Congrats on that new addition and blessing, by the way! And I was happy to include a mention to your blog post. It’s a great idea with very helpful details.


  5. 5 love languages is a wonderful book. It is a timeless piece.
    Lovely ideas.
    Thank you for refreshing my memory.
    Blessings to you Beth.


    1. Yes it is, Ifeoma. It can be something that sparks not only a romantic date but a rekindling of a discouraged marriage, I believe. Thanks for linking up and joining the conversation, my friend. Always glad to have you here!


  6. My hubs’ love language is bow-chicka-wow-wow and mine is acts of service!!!! For some reason this post makes me laugh not because of the content (which is good) but the bow-chicka-wow-wow really tickled me – and well, you know how I love to laugh!!! xo


    1. Yeah, my girlfriends and I use that term all the time to rib each other about our love lives, Susan! ha! So it felt so natural to add it here in another sweet place of friendship! Thanks for joining the conversation and encouraging me to boot!


  7. Bev @ Walking Well With God Avatar
    Bev @ Walking Well With God

    I had to chuckle at Susan’s comment…I would say my husband falls in the bow-chicka-wow-wow category (what man doesn’t lol). Seriously though, these are some great ideas for all the special people in my life – including my hubby 🙂
    Blessings and Happy Valentine’s Day,
    Bev xx


    1. Yes, I believe that most husbands, even if that’s not their love language, do love a bow-chicka-wow-wow moment on Valentines Day! ha! Thanks for your encouragement, Bev! Always great to see your smiling face in the linkup and comments!


  8. Great ideas, Beth. I’m going to use a couple of these. Thanks for hosting and have a great week!


    1. I hope you do, Donna! I think I’m going to use a couple of them myself! Funny how our blog posts stir intentional and proactive actions in our marriages! Thanks for your friendship and support, girlfriend!


      1. And for yours, Beth! Hope you and your husband have a sweet Valentine’s Day!


  9. Really good tips for Valentine’s Day gifts. Thank you for sharing! Happy Wednesday!


    1. Thanks, Meg! Glad to have you in the linkup!


  10. Beth, I appreciate this thoughtful list of ideas that suit different preferences. Thanks so much! I tend to fall into a rut.


    1. Me too, Debbie. If it weren’t for my blog and the constant effort to think about what I can do to help others, I probably would be so lazy in my marriage. I really feel like I need to use everything I post about here. Sometimes my “tools” or “exercises” are developed for own needs and used long before I write about them. And sometimes they come as a result of wanting to help others. But either way I go, I’m challenged and strengthened in my marriage by my own marriage blog! Imagine that! Thanks for your encouragement, my friend!


  11. My husband loves to be touched… I love a lot of hugs and cuddles.
    Great ideas shared here Beth, and I love that you shared inexpensive ways of giving this Valentine.
    Have a super blessed day!


    1. That’s always great when a couple shares the physical touch love language. I think those are probably some of the most healthy marriages, Ugochi. Thanks for your kind words. I did try to offer alternatives to high priced gifts, so I’m glad you noticed that.


  12. Love the Five Love Languages. I’ve always felt a bit guilty that I like gifts a whole lot. And time and acts of service are right up there, too. My hubby’s two main ones are the exact opposite of mine. Isn’t that how it always is??!! Thanks for linking up with Literacy Musing Mondays.


  13. Thanks for the reminder that love languages are practical ways to express love. I’m an affirmation gal and my hubs is a touch kind of guy. It’s easy to get lulled into giving your preference rather than someone else’s


  14. I am quality time, and it was no surprise years ago to see my husband is physical touch. ? Some of my favorite times with him are the nights we sit and talk!


  15. love the love languages – time to fill out some service cards for my Man-in-Plaid!


  16. I love the ideas you share here and am so grateful for your support of the #LMMLinkup.


  17. Hi Beth! I’m glad I visited from #sittingamongfriends and discovered your linkup! I’ll be back on Tuesdays to linkup in the future. This is a post full of wonderful ideas. I plan to share it on my Facebook page. Glad to meet you!


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