I don’t think many people will debate me on this, but I really think that there are about as many neat freaks in the world as there are slobs.

However, I have another theory that many might not agree with so easily. I don’t think we can apply that principle to messiness in marriage.

In other words, I think that everyone, from time to time, is messy in their marriage.

Some couples have really messy marriages all throughout their marriages. Some couples have seasons of messiness. And some couples have less messiness than others. But we all have messiness because we are messy people. And we are all messy because we are human—we sin and make mistakes daily, if not hourly. No one has ever been “Wonder Wife” or “Super Hubby” fully prepared with a golden attitude and a perfect response for each and every marital challenge.

Honestly, it took me and my husband about half of our lives to figure out how to get along (We’re slow learners).

But the fact is, marriage is hard—really hard.

So if you think that you’re the only one who makes messes in your marriage, then I really think you’re not seeing the world for what it is.

One of the goals I have for this blog is to de-stigmatize the messy realities of marriage. I hope that you and others will realize that one of the first things necessary for cleaning up a messy marriage is admitting that you make mistakes.

Thankfully, we’re not left to clean up our marriages alone. In fact, if we try to do it on our own, we are doomed to fail. We need to rely on God—minute by minute—to give us the ability to overcome our tendency to make a mess. So from one messy to the other—get rid of the tights and be real!

“These are all warning markers—danger!—in our history books, written down so that we don’t repeat their mistakes. Our positions in the story are parallel—they at the beginning, we at the end—and we are just as capable of messing it up as they were. Don’t be so naive and self-confident. You’re not exempt. You could fall flat on your face as easily as anyone else. Forget about self-confidence; it’s useless. Cultivate God-confidence.” —1 Corinthians 10:11-12 (MSG)